NaBloPoMo #6


When I took on this challenge to post to my blog every day for 30 days, I thought I would never come up with enough interesting matter to fill the month.

I was right.

So I am going to tell you about my plan to do everything on my Bucket List. The problem is that as I cross off one thing, two things take it’s place! Isn’t that the way it always is?

Anyway, for many years I have wanted to learn how to play the piano. I dreamed of it. I longed for it. It never crossed my mind that I actually would be able to do it. And yet, thanks to the generosity of my husband and a very good friend, a beautiful Baldwin piano sits in my living room. This is more than learning how to play. It’s more than satisfying my quest to do ‘things’ before I die. What it really is about is confidence, self esteem, and overcoming many issues. Not to dwell on the past or share a woe-is-me sob story that may or may not be as real as remembered, but I grew up with zero self esteem. Whether it was because of my family environment, my extreme shyness, or the inner dialog in my head, I was always the one to hang back and not join in or abandon my fears to reach for the stars.

Whatever.

When I started my bucket list many years after I grew up, I added things to it that I truly wanted to do at some point, but deep inside never had the confidence to start. I had to challenge myself. I had to overcome a lot of obstacles like fibromyalgia, clinical depression, and a huge tendency to rely on stinkin’ thinkin’. But I was determined that I would do something on my list, anything just to prove to myself that I could. What followed was just weird. As I began to finish and cross off bucket list tasks, I started feeling different. It didn’t happen overnight and it began with #1 on the list. My heart’s desire was to write a book. It took me three years to do it but I did. It’s not perfect, probably could still use some work, and it is self-published, but I love it. Oh not because, to my surprise, it has been received well, but because it gave me the shot in the ass I needed to begin nurturing a little I-can-do-it attitude.

This brings me to another bucket list item, my piano. I bought a piano instructional manual for adult beginners, and I opened the first page. It looked simple enough. Right hand black keys, left hand black keys. Moving on to the white keys one hand at a time. Then both hands, first one than the other playing a tune from childhood memory simple enough for an adult beginner to bravely put fingers (and heart) in position to learn. It’s only taken a few weeks to learn the Alphabet Waltz, Joy to the World, Ode to Joy, and The River Is Wide. I haven’t learned about chords, major, minor whatevers, and timing, But I am having so much fun. And like writing a book, I am going to keep plugging at it until I am satisfied that I’ve learned all I can. I have visions of playing along with a Yanni cd someday. LOL! A girl can dream can’t she? After all isn’t that what it’s all about – reaching for your dreams? Besides, if I have learned anything on this journey, I have learned this: You never stop learning, that is, if you don’t want to. I don’t want to stop learning. I feel like I was a late bloomer and now is the time to catch up.

a dream come true

a dream come true

What would you love to do/learn now at this point in your life? Believe in yourself and do it. God will smile with you.

By the way, don’t forget to pray for peace. Please.

Advertisements